Let Me Remind You, You Were The Best Part Of My Life



Sometimes I think it's over. That we're fooling eachother by sticking it out. That we're just to scared to admit that it's not working and walk away. Some times I convince my self that no matter what I say or do or how much I offer to change about my self or how much of my self I give to you that you will never honestly love me again.

Then something happens. I spend a few days with you. We forget about the outside world and all of the things that are against us. All I see is you and all you see is me. We are eachothers top priority. I wake up to your soft kisses and your strong arms around me in your bed that's much too small for two grown adults and I feel safe. I feel like nothing could beat this highest of high that I feel. It's like the world doesn't make any sense and my vision is constantly blurred when I'm not with you. You bring the clarity that I crave. Everything is right and nothing is wrong. My world is perfect until I watch your car pull away and reality catches back up to me.

The distance is like a knife slowly cutting me open and letting all that makes me whole spill out onto the floor. The longer we are apart the harder it is to put it all back inside. It makes me realize to keep this new found happiness I need to be closer to you. I need to eliminate the distance. I convince myself to take the nessicary steps to make this happen.

Sometimes I feel you pull away from me. You react to things that don't need to be reacted to. You choose other things over me. You don't see when you hurt me or how your actions could hurt me. It's insane to think that things could be so amazing three days prior and now we're arguing and talking to eachother like we're two seperate beings on two seperate planets with entirely different goals. Sometimes I think you view me as a stranger. It's like when I'm not there with my hand in yours you forget who I am and what I am supose to mean to you and how you feel about me. I don't know whether to put you in your place or pretend nothing was said and all is well.

It's all for nothing though because within a week I will be back in your arms, laughing at our enemey distance and telling him to suck it. We both know he's just sharpening his knife for next time but we don't care. You may be confused but I know that I have enough love for the both of us for the time being. Hopefully you'll remember where you placed yours soon, before mine wears thin. I'd hate to imagine life without you. I'd hate to let distance win.

Later Days
Santi